Gag me. No don't.

Is there anyway for someone to write about people talking about music that doesn't sound horribly cheesy and contrived.
Let's use Juno as an example. When Jason Bateman and Ellen Page talk about music, she says something along the lines of 'after hearing Iggy Pop and the Stooges everything else seems...' something, an adjective, I don't remember which. And then Jason Bateman's all 'This is my favorite song, Sonic Youth blah blah'.
And it all just sounds so fake and lame.
Another great example, Natalie Portman hands her headphones to Zach Braff and says The Shins will change his life. Barf.
This is all good for soundtrack sales. And for making music lovers (read: snobs) gag.

Why doesn't this work? Why do I wince? I have and listen to conversations about music constantly. Do I wince then? Yes I do, who am I kidding.
This makes me think of Annie Hall.

So how did Melissa and I sound when she complained about the guitar playing on Justin Timberlake's tour. Not enough soul she claimed, while I was like whatever that's how arena tours sound and isn't his dancing so dreamy. Would there have been eye rolling?

Well I wanna try and recreate or invent something that sounds real and not nauseating, something you, my reader, won't roll your eyes at.

Ok, so how about this. Melissa and Angela in 'Tom Petty v. David Bowie.'

M: Tom Petty's not that amazing.
A: I love him. You love him, what are you talking about?
M: Kind of boring.
A: He writes such good songs.
M: He's no David Bowie.
A: They're just different.
M: David Bowie has more range.
A: Well duh, but Tom Petty is more relatable.
M: I don't think so.
A: Um, yeah, that's an actual fact.
M: Well I think more people can relate to David Bowie.
A: No way, Tom Petty writes about love, luck, life. David Bowie is bedazzling his unitards writing songs about other solar systems.
M: And David Bowie influenced way more people.
A: Maybe, but I think if you surveyed the general public, more people would like to live in Tom Petty's world than David Bowie's.
M: I wouldn't wanna live in Tom Petty's world.
A: I think you would. I've never seen you wear anything glittery.
M: David Bowie's world is a JAM. Tom Petty's world is a stonerfest.
A: There's more to him than just 'relaxing'. He shows a very wide range of emotions.
M: Not really.
A: My brother is trying to convince people that John Mellencamp is under-appreciated.
M: John Mellencamp's got nothin' on David Bowie.
A: What is it with you and David Bowie?
M: The hair. And that glorious vibrato.
A: Well you've got me there.

do I win?
take that, Diablo.


written by the TALL.